If we ever meet, again

 Sometimes I imagine how life would’ve had been

If I hadn’t had pushed you away

And you would've had chased me afresh.

I get comfortable in my chair 

while my mind plays these turbulent games.

I think of all those late-night chats, 

secret confessions, 

dark and dry humor, 

stupid wordy capers,

I think of endless cheesy flirtation,

nostalgic vacations, 

the morning sun watched together in euphoric elation.

These and then many other not-so-peaceful things,

Things that made me feel alone,

Things that made you feel choked,

Things which both of us knew was wrong still none could stop.

I tried to make some distance,

You understood me too well to protest.

We separated with fake smiles,

The dissociation turning our taste-buds to bile,

Consolidating ourselves that it's better to put this aside.

But still, when our anniversary month arrives,

These thoughts plague me every time,

What would've had been of us, 

if we weren't miles apart,

And had been together to sort it out.

I guess this might be mutual case,

And in this life's circular race,

I will expect this from you to explain,

If we ever meet, again.

.

- Raj Nandani